ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRH!!!!
Idio*!

look at this!
all my icons are gone!!!
can't upload pictures, cant enlarge the words!
PISSED!!!

i am really troubled.
lots of unnecessary worries.

anw o levels is such a waste of time.
make me study...=[

erm chem is good, english paper1 is good, paper2 suck!
Geog paper1 is good, MATHS suck a thousand times more. =O [grrr!]
his is good, physics is good... gosh tmr is that stupid maths again!
God, all i can do is dcepend on you!

Ytd had a quarrel with mummy... but a short while only. but i know that she sounded very upset.
i promise to respect her decision. Therefore the end product is...NO FAIRFIELD CAMP> -,_-[sobbed]

and yes the very fact that i wanted to blog is becos i was really upset now.
No one knows how i feel. all i can do is to cry to God. told mummy. she was like feeling bad for me too.

Just now had a long conversation with teacher.
i name the teacher "MS TEACHER" for now.

what she said was good, but somehow bad to me.
i felt really hurt after hearing it.

i believe she said out of concern but it really made me feel really hurt.
Told ms foo bout that. wanted to confide in her, though it helps but i still feel sad. i was cryingin the bus.
[ i know it sounded stupid and silly]

whats all bout GLORY!
i don care bout GLORY. thats not what i wanted all the while.
how long can GLORY last?
how GLORIOUS can you be?
i don need GLORY to stay in GB.
And i don want to have glory in GB.
All i want is ACHIEVEMENTS
can you see the difference.
but the fact is that when you had so many achievements, glory comes automatically.
i don need ppl to come to me and curry favour me. cos i don really appreciate that too.
i don want GLORY.


I don see the DI Badge as a glory. it is an achievement

I don see the 2nd top individual fortnight collectoras a glory. it is an achievement

My intentions are not everything bout GLORY and FAME.

if i am someone who is so so selfish that all i want to gain in Gb is GLORY, den why do i bother to teach the girls drill.
i can be good myself, but not teach others. And why do i bother to humble myself and tell thhe girls who went for Di test this yr "i am sorry, becos i didn tell your that there is commanding".
my batch di test didn even had commanding.

If its all bout GLORY, den whhy do i care so much bout the coy.
if its all bout GLoRY, why do i care so much bout friendship.

The qn asked just now really cause me to think if i am suppose to go back to serve.
And i even served 52nd for 3 years already, planning to serve next yr again.
52nd didn give me any GLORY, sometimes i really feel so left out. i feel bored yet i go cos my heart is at 52nd. Is there GLORY?

PBB wasnt a GLORY. it was a failure.
If i go back next yr , do you think that i wont be shy.gonig for a 2nd try. it suck ok.

I treat 54th as my family. the way MS TEACHER said is like i am someone who wants GLORY. I am dying for many many achievements but not GLORY.

54th doesnt give me any Glory either.
And i kept thinking is joining drill com a right choice.
My dad is bugging me to go get some part time jobs while waitnig for my o levels result. and becos i know i committed thats why i refuse to.


And i nv ever disrespect my officers

I know sometimes i am stubborn, might not listen to all instructions, but i wont rebel.

If in any case i feel that this is not the right place to serve, i really wanna give up. but i will join post sec still.
its SERIOUS. to me this is a seriuos matter. Because this is something really impt to me.

GOD, i am angry, troubled, upset and alot. pls give me guidance. thank you for being with me now.
you are gonna sit through my entire o levels paper with me. =]
Daddy GOd, i love you. You are my only GLORY!

Labels: God's light shine., In the darkness